It's likely quite obvious that I am not one for "memes" or clever little posters hanging on my walls such as that kitten saying "hang in there" despite my proclivity towards certain mantras such as "Forward is our Friend" and "We're not going to the Olympics tomorrow". I must admit, however, I recently stumbled across a meme somewhere down the rabbit hole we call the internet while searching for the exact wording of a book quote. Yes, it falls in to that category of "clever" and it is probably on a poster with a picture of a kitten falling out of a tree. But it was simple and I must admit perfect for our chosen profession/hobby/passion.
It simple said F.A.I.L.=First Attempt In Learning.
Now, I am the first to admit that I am always in the process of learning, I ask questions, watch closely and taken any opportunity given to gain knowledge from those around me whom I know to have broader experiences. I have one gal in particular that I tell on a regular basis (after which I duck and run like the dickens even though it is a compliment) "I hope I know HALF about horsemanship as you when I am your age". So, when I stumbled on this FAIL meme, it really did hit me, THIS is exactly what I have been trying to tell my students for years, but in a much more clear and concise manner.
I often find myself trying to explain how to leave the past in the past and to not beat themselves up over making a mistake because mistakes are how we learn and I can give you examples of my mistakes all day long but until you make them and feel them for yourself you will not truly understand why XYZ is so important....(yes, that is purposely a run on sentence as I am quite sure that is how my students hear listening to it.).
What I find hard to fit in there is how IMPORTANT those mistakes are to the learning process and that they are, in fact, a positive aspect. Most of us know the Edison quote "I have not failed, I found 1000 ways not to make a light bulb" and I used to use that to try and instill the value of making a mistake to my students. And yet, FAIL still has a very negative connotation to it, even in a quote trying to show the good in trying.
Even as adults if we hear FAIL we shrink a bit, we remember a failed test, the disappointment from teachers and parents and soon we tried so hard not to FAIL we actually began to skip learning all together and began to merely regurgitate information. We shut down our ability to think critically. In riding, when we can not/do not think critically we can not/will not succeed and more forward.
If I ask a student "why" their own body or their horses did something (bad or good) a large percentage of the time I receive the question back reformed as an answer. It has been in recent years I have come to realize the are so fearful of giving me the wrong answer, of FAILING my test, they would rather give no answer at all.
And so, this brings me back to FAIL, I WANT my students to FAIL!! I want my students to have that First Attempt in Learning, I want the fear of FAILURE to cease and the realization become "I tried something new/more difficult today. It did not go as planned, but I understand it better and I will understand it more the next time". Be mindful to give your horse this opportunity as well, you may not realize it, but our horses are just as sensitive to that feeling they have let us down, it is merely a matter of how that particular animal conveys it.
So, Tack up and ride, drive, what ever your pleasure and be prepared to FAIL! Be proud of yourself for being brave enough to FAIL! When you embrace that the FAIL will, in fact, move you forward, you are preparing yourself for a much more satisfying horsemanship experience.
All you have to do, is not quit.
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